Wild Gray Goose

Celtic tradition identifies the Holy Spirit as a Wild Goose. He is the wings of a Wild God best followed by the wildest of men. I'm gray. I'm wild. Like He, I am not always predictable, rational, or safe. I believe my full life and my still maturing years of Walking With God offer both heart and substance for younger lads to consider. Now with 4th stage prostate cancer, following the Wild Goose has a different pace and perspective worth reflecting on...and sharing.

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Location: Full Time RV, mostly near Temecula, California, United States

I'm a young fella not far from 73 who's made it to the far and frayed edges of the adventures I‘ve been hankering for since boyhood. The age thing and my pursuits are relevant since I now have advanced 4th stage cancer, moved from unsuccessful chemo treatment to oral med...and they seem to be working. Now, after selling the ranch, my beautiful life-mate of 48 years and I live and travel in an fifth wheel RV we call our "covered wagon". The new and rich development of 2012 is our purchase of ranch in the marvelous plateau above GRAND JUNCTION at the head of the Colorado National Monument where my young family with six children run a whole-family therapy ranch, DEEP RIVERS FAMILY RANCH.

Friday, March 02, 2012

Winging My Way in Life's Dusk-Light

I am prompted this morning by my quiet wonderings our of yesterday's event as big expensive medical machines scanned silently for a battle report; my Provenge-trained guys in white hats against the fierce black-hatted prostate cancer thugs.  Mostly it's long-forgotten, esoteric writings that give hints of glory found at life's end.  I thought it was time for an update.  Thus, this morning's journal entry.  Long, but deep.  Don't start reading if you don't have five more minutes to grab some dusk-light.

Thoughts along the trail are more like a slide show than a You Tube video of the journey; more a head and heart report than a travelogue.  Oh, but what a journey it has been--AND IS!  There is room in my heart but no words my lips can shape to express the inexplicable glory of Grace and the presence of Jesus deep down and throughout my being.

Seems my life's light is taking on the faint glow of dusk. My reflections may be prompted by the old fashioned stinky day, now yesterday's history; too busy by half, too unfulfilling by whole.  Or, could it be the passion for Cari, Taylor, Colton, Brooke, Gracen, Charis (oh, yes, now there is The Gift that keeps on giving), and Kira.  And Matt?  Distinct because sons-in-law as best friends reflects the unique role we play in each other's lives.  Or, it may be that all of this is framed by the extraordinary love of an extraordinary woman and which makes the reading of today's Scripture so powerful with joy that I find myself--again, inexplicably--grateful, even excited, that the Journey's end is just over there around the corner shimmering in the somehow glorious glow of dusk.

Whatever the source--or, The Source--this glow from the deeps of my soul and the tear forming just above each corner of my smile encompasses a very small world.  I have no fame of worth that is not granted by these few.  And, it is enough.  And it brings cherished light to David's rejoicing in Psalm 9, spoken out of the terror of life gone wrong, "I'm thanking God from a full heart with whistling, laughing, singing, and jumping for joy."  Then my pal Apostle Paul said of a life of worship portrayed vividly in Philippians 4(v4-9) that a "sense of God's wholeness will settle you down."  To which I said, "AAAaaaaah, yes, this God I worship and walk with is worthy of more praise than I can give Him."  And I can ride around that corner on  the trail lighted only dimly at dusk but somehow bright and alluring as if I were finding Home.

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