Yes, it's a lame play on the word. But it fits.
My life, unlike this blog, has few empty spots. Full is good. But,
sometimes, "full" is too much. Under the "finish well"
mantra, we full-life guys overdo a lot of things when we see the end in sight.
Guilty, your honor. Slowing more than just a bit forced by a fatal disease
allows reflections that do not mature at high speed. Reflections that turn
inward where the heart, redeemed by God, becomes a filter for all else out
These are the days called by some the "sunset years." The mystery
of post-Fall disease is really the wonderful mystery of a holy God's character.
How He dispenses pain and suffering and to whom He dispenses it is a question
whose answer can only find sense in Heaven.
Which brings me to Sonrise and sunsets. My fourth stage aggressive prostate
cancer hastens the end of life metaphor. From light to shades of dark to
"lights out" when referring to the shortened life of one of God's
elect and redeemed is like one of those slow motion replays. "Yikes, where
did it all go?" But the Grace of Death is like the sunset, hastened or not.
Right before the dark comes the dazzle of mellow golds, oranges, blues, and
greens. Most of that is family, three generations all in one place, our blessed
Deep Rivers Family Ranch.
So, the Sonrise thing? Today, again, I am seeing at this very moment as I
write in haste to catch its full impact, the most, the absolutely most,
incredible beauty in a sunrise. I watched it for an hour yesterday, eager for
the family to awake so I can share its joy. Honestly, it is a delight to be
shared but somehow this slow UNhastened sunrise--fiery red like I've never,
ever seen--seems a gift just for me. So, SONrise ain't so lame after all.
I'm up early for my cancer meds (you'll get the picture in a second). It's
quiet for another hour. There's ten of us living here. So I see--yes, the sky
is still incredibly ablaze--this morning as a gift. I will prize all the day
then look eagerly ahead for tomorrow's gift, first the Sonrise, then the love
it represents found in this family.
I cannot answer the
question. That, too, awaits Heaven's timeless moment:
? Election, salvation, and years of Grace unearned. Why this Sonrise?
'Scuse me now. I have just enough of the Gift left to pace the deck outside
to take in its full expanse. I wonder if this is the morning I'll see deer or
elk. That would be ribbons and bows on the Gift.
NO WAY!! Ribbons and bows of gold. Nope, nothing off the deck across our valley. Back to the kitchen for one more cup of coffee...THERE THEY WERE!. Four deer just above the woodpile munching their way slowly across the hillside. What a wonderous and gracious God. More lessons from On High? Some of the Creator's best qifts are wrapped with a note on the tag. Mine read: "Keep it slow and full. My best gift of all awaits up here. I'm preparing a ranch mansion for you, but I'm not ready for you quite yet."
|The SON rises to greet me. What Grace! |
|And wrapped with Golden Bows|